Relationships That Lasts: 2009

50 First Dates

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Have you ever watched the romantic comedy 50 First Dates? Wow, this movie has totally blown me off. It is super nice. One of the very best movies I have ever seen so far. I just love Drew Barrymore and I love Adam Sandler too. Adam Sandler is very very natural when it comes to comedy. He is good looking yet when he strikes a punchline without even trying, he makes me burst to laughter. I had to hold my pee in laughing.
While, Drew Barrymore was totally adoring in her beautiful face. I tell you, she's not the very skinny models or actress that is totally sexy and all that, but she is chubby yet her face is very lovely. When she smiles, it seems like everything lits up. Her greatest asset is definitely her smile.
I do believe that thats the kind of girl every man wants to have. Very pure, charming, happy inside, and contended. A person'a happiness reflects in her face, in her smiles. And nothing fascinates a man than that of pure happiness from a woman.
That is why when Adam Sandler met her in the movie, even if she was sick with amnesia, wherein she couldn't remember the new daily events from the time she had an accident, he never let her go. Even if, it meant courting the girl every single day, and knowing that the girl would never know her when she wakes up everyday because of her amnesia.

I tell you, this will make you fall in love in light way. It will make you cry but will make you laugh more because of the many antics of the movie.
Fall in love over and over with this movie.

Posted by Aloha! at 1:18 AM 0 comments

Focus on the Center of all Relationships

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Shannen Fields, whom I admired for playing an ideal wife to a football coach, is also someone to be admired in real life. She has a clear understanding of life, and she knows the most important key to successful relationships: Start with your relationship with God first.

She says: "Balancing my time in order to have my quiet time with God is something that I have to do "on purpose!"

At times I have to say NO to other things. Life is tough no matter what your age is and we have to make a choice to make the time to spend with God or not!"

I think she got this serence, peaceful, loving and cheerful attitude from his practice of putting God first in her life, despite her life as a busy person. This surely inspires me to work on spending my own time with God.

Posted by Aloha! at 7:26 PM 0 comments

She Inspired Me To Be An Ideal Wife

Friday, May 15, 2009

If you have watched Facing the Giants, you will see Shannen Fields, who played the role of Brooke Taylor, the wife of a football coach played by Alex Kendrick - who is on the verge of losing everything in his life, including his job. Plus, the fact that they are having difficulty conceiving a baby that it almost becomes impossible.

I really like her role, cause she resembled an ideal wife. When hes husband comes home disappointed over a problem at work, she doesn't nag or judge her husband. Instead, she listens attentively, lovingly, with full understanding and empathy which gives him comfort and strength to move on. She is a very serene woman and she is so sweet when she speaks. She respects her husband so much and this makes his husband love her more and more. She was one of the reasonw hy his husband became successful in the end.

I am working on becoming such as ideal wife like her. I'm sure every husband would love a non-judgmental, good listener wife. Our husbands needs our love and appreciation specially during their down times. Most of the time when they air a problem to us, we lecture a lot to them and tell them what to do, which makes them feel even worst and they would feel you are bragging even if your intention is not. When they say something, most likely than not, what they want for you to do is to listen attentively and show that you understand and that what they feel are acknowledge.

Posted by Aloha! at 7:21 PM 0 comments

Commit To Become An Ideal Wife To Him

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

A good wife is not born to be someone like that. A person doesn't come up in the world and wakes up to be the near perfect partner that she can be to her spouse. To become one, you need to nurture your character, identify your weaknesses and work on them slowly but surely, focus on your strengths and magnify them. You simply need to learn everyday. And as always, experience is always the best teacher. Every choice we make every day determines our future and says a lot about the kind of person that we are.

We cannot claim to love our spouse if we don't give him that respect he deserves to have.
We cannot keep arguing with them, and say that our relationship with them is our priority.
Our actions, simply tells what are intentions are.

Nothing could be more of a badluck than being married to a grumpy, negative, unrespectful and selfish wife. A woman could break or make a man. A wise and positive woman can guide her better half to become a stronger person achieving his fullest potential. While, a negative and critical wife, can fully turn a positive man into someone negative and full of disappointments in life.

There is no such thing as a perfect wife. What is important that we give our best in our relationships, and we try hard to become better each day. As with me, I started out really bad, as I would say, I wasn't really ready to become a partner yet. But, through my determination and commitment to our love, I stayed and I am glad I did. The mother's day letter I received from my husband is just a confirmation that my efforts are paying of.

The Letter

Hon, Happy Mothers day. Ginawa ko ito para masabi ko sayo at malaman mo ang pagka ina mo. Hon, maraming salamat na wala kang katulad na ina, your the best mom. READ MORE.

Posted by Aloha! at 7:00 PM 0 comments

43 Secrects To A Happy Marriage

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Never assume.

Compliment more than you criticize.

For each time you vent about your husband/wife to your friends, tell three positive stories.

Remember that it is okay to do things differently (e.g. there is more than one way to peel a potato or fold the laundry).

Always make time for the two of you.

Marry someone that you enjoy listening and talking to.

Remember that marriage is sometimes a bed of roses and sometimes there are thorns.

Remember that the best gift that you can give your children is to love their mother/father.

Be fair! Split the housework, spending money, etc evenly. This way you are never resentful of your partners contributions (or lack of) or expenditures.

Never go to bed angry. (Unless it's 3a.m. and you're exhausted, angry, and not thinking straight.)

Remember that people do fight. It's how you do it that matters.

Before starting an argument, consider if it's really worth it.

Fight naked. ;)

Agree to disagree.

Never, ever mention the "D" word (divorce).

Do you want to be right or do you want to be married?

Respect each others' privacy.

Remember that "love is like childhood. You need to learn to share."

Marriage is not 50/50, it's two people giving 100/100 all of the time.

Surprise each other now and then.

The secret to a happy marriage is two TV's!

Have date night!

Never pass up an opportunity to say "I love you".

Hold hands.

Hug & kiss every day (several times a day actually!).

Always believe that you got better than you deserved.

Be quick to say "I'm sorry".

Choose the one you love, then love the one you choose.

Keep the in-laws out of your marriage!

Love isn't always a feeling, it's a decision.

Hang in there. It's worth it.

Play nice, play often, love much.

Never air your dirty laundry as a couple in public.

Never keep secrets from each other.

Be each others' champion. No matter what, take your husband or wife's side first!

Communication is the key!

Always respect each other.

Never underestimate the power of a good belly-laugh and don't be afraid to laugh at yourself.

It's the little things that matter most.

Never use the words 'Always' and 'Never' in a fight.

It's ok to argue, but never use curse words to express your anger.

Never compare your marriage to others. What you see on the outside is not always what it is on the inside.

Don't make love in the same place/position every time. Variety is the spice of life!

I got this list from Roman Stuck, and I think this is an awesome list. I am positive following these tips will bring a positive result in every relationships. I would like to make use of this too in my own relationship.

Posted by Aloha! at 3:12 PM 0 comments

Smiling People Are More Likely To Have Successful Marriage

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

You heard it right, what I said is true and has just been proven through research and tests. A group of psychologists have discovered that people who smile more in their older photos such as a yearbook, are more likely to have successful marriage later on. They conducted a study, and they found out that among the 10% of the greatest smilers (people who really smiled in a yearbook photo) none had a failure in marriage. While, within the bottom 10 % of the smilers, almost 1 in four had a failed marriage. In another study, conducted to support this theory, they asked photos of 65 year old people in their early or younger years. Those who are smiling and happy in their photos, only had 10% of failed marriage, while 31 % of the frowners had broken relationships.
The general conclusion is that people who frowns and wear sad smiles in photos have five times more likelihood of divorce and broken marriages. Hard to believe? This is the truth, and even the psychologists who conducted the test have a puzzle in explaining, though they also have varied possible explanations.
It could be that those who smile more in photos indicate a happier disposition in life, which makes it easy for marriage and family life. Another is that, happy people attracts the same kind of people, so this combination would have a strong likelihood of setting this marriage and partnership up for success.
So in all of these information, we can really say that how we carry outselves today, and our outlook of life, really has a strong impact on what our life will become in the future. Whatever we do today, will have an effect on what will happen to our lives in the future.

Original Article/Source: Smiles Predict Marriage Success

Posted by Aloha! at 4:24 AM 0 comments

Watch This To Improve Your Relationships

Sunday, April 5, 2009

People are so busy nowadays. Most of us are guilty of taking our loved ones for granted. Yes, it is taken that our loved ones might already know that they are important to us, and that they matter so much. That they are the reason why we are so busy, trying to get a decent life for them. But, we fail to invest our time on spending it with them, thus, we cannot blame them if they doubt our love for us. The way we manage our time, reveals our priorities. And while, the current economy, might create the need for us to always be on the go, and look for ways of creating money to support our families, we should not forget ever to spend our precious time with them. It doesn't matter how short or long it is, per day. As long its regular. And remember, its not quantity but quality that matters most. If you think, you are this person, who have somewhat neglecting your loved ones, specially your life partner or your kids, you better watch the movie of "World Trade Center", a true to life story of 2 policemen who survived the tragedy of the World Trade Center Attack.
It is a heartfelt story. It will make you cry, and make you appreciate the life of your loved one more.

WORLD TRADE CENTER

From the three time Academy Award winner Oliver Stone comes this inspiring story about courage, family and our nation's unyielding spirit. Oscar winner Nicolas Cage and Michael Peña star as John McLoughlin and Will Jimeno, two New York City Port Authority policemen who were trapped n the rubble of September 11, 2001. As McLoughlin and Jimeno bond together in a fight for survival, the events of an unimaginable day unfold through the eyes of the two policemen, their loving wives (Maria Bello and Maggie Gyllenhal), survivors and rescuers throughout the city.

Posted by Aloha! at 1:38 AM 0 comments

Five Things Super Happy Couples Do

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Daily Habit #1: Talk to Each Other

Happily married couples typically say their relationships work better when they can sit down and gab one-on-one, like thinking, feeling adults. But who's got time for that? Actually, anybody who sleeps at night, if you follow the lead of Julie and Thom and their nightly visits to their "igloo."

"It all started one winter night years ago, when Julie had had a really bad day," says Thom, 33, a marketing director in Columbus, Ohio. "We were huddled under the covers of our bed, and Julie was describing how all the people who made her day miserable were 'bad polar bears' and how she didn't want any of the bad polar bears coming into the bedroom and how the bed was our refuge from them. You realize how embarrassing it is to admit this, right? Anyway, that's when we started calling the bed the igloo."

"The igloo is a place to retreat to," says Julie, 31. "It's our little sanctuary; only nice things happen in the igloo."

Eventually Julie and Thom began holding a powwow in the igloo at the end of every day, making a nightly excursion that Julie says has become a vital part of their five-year relationship.

"It's funny, because I always thought that when you lived with somebody, you'd automatically know everything that was going on," she says. "But we find that if we don't take that time to connect with each other, it's really easy for life to get in the way. The igloo offers one of the few times in the day where there's not a whole heck of a lot else going on, so you're able to focus on each other in a deeper way."

Daily Habit #2: Flirt

Most couples realize that getting intimate every night isn't possible, let alone a worthy goal. Indeed, a 1994 University of Chicago survey of Americans' physical intimacy habits found that only about a third of adults have physical intimacy more than once a week.

That doesn't mean, though, that you can't at least talk sensually every day, and that's the approach that Ed and Stephanie have taken in the more than six years they've been together.

"It's funny," says Ed, a 33-year-old San Francisco cab driver, "because we know plenty of couples who fight, a lot, about how often they have physical intimacy. The wife's upset because all he ever wants to do is get intimate. But this has never really been a problem with us, and I think it has a lot do with the fact that we're always talking sensually to each other."

"Absolutely," says Stephanie, a 32-year-old massage therapist. "We're always complimenting each other, tossing out fantasies, telling each other we're appealing. He gets to feel like he can have sensual feelings, and I feel like I don't have to have physical intimacy all the time to appear attractive.

Let's put it this way: The way I see it, physical intimacy is like chocolate cake. After five days of eating chocolate cake, even chocolate cake doesn't taste that great."

"Right," Ed says, "but after five days of talking about chocolate cake, that cake tastes really good."

Daily Habit #3: Get Stupid Together

Bob and Angie are ashamed to admit that the daily ritual that brings such joy to their 12-year marriage is none other than reality TV. That's right. They lived and died with "Survivor." They've adopted "Big Brother." "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?" They do.

"Honestly, I think we just need to be dumb for a while," says Bob, 37, a shoe designer for Reebok in Boston. "We're both very into our careers. And when you're at work, with any job there's going to be a certain amount of professional stress. You like to come home sometimes and, for that lousy hour or whatever, kick back and relax."

Or as Angie, 36, a marketing executive, says, "Life is serious enough, isn't it? Sometimes you need to do something stupid. And if you can't be stupid with your husband, who can you be stupid with?"

Daily Habit #4: Declare Your Independence

So hold on, then: Is domestic joy found in partners smothering each other in obsessive daily rituals?

Hardly. In fact, Tessina says that sleepwalking through a series of hollow routines (although probably an apt description of your day job) is worse for your relationship than having no routines at all. The solution, she says, is to also make a daily habit of getting away from each other.

The point, naturally, is not to make space for each other in that I-can't-wait-to-get-away-from-you sort of way but to pursue your own hobbies and interests. It's a distinction that Joe tried hard to make to Lori during their delicate pre-engagement negotiations four years ago.

These days, Lori and Joe are practically poster children for the power of independence. Joe, who works for a nonprofit agency, spends his nights taking painting classes, building youth centers, and recording his guitar sessions. Lori, a college professor, spends hers directing community-theater musicals and indulging in trashy movies on cable television, a passion that Joe (go figure) doesn't seem to share.

"It all brings a freshness to our relationship because we both continue to grow as people," Joe says.

Daily Habit #5: Share a Spiritual Moment

In another University of Chicago survey, this one of married couples, 75 percent of the Americans who pray with their spouses reported that their marriages are "very happy" (compared to 57 percent of those who don't). Those who pray together are also more likely to say they respect each other and discuss their relationship together.

Not to say that prayer is a cure for all that ails you. But whether they're talking about a simple grace at dinnertime or some soul-searching meditation, couples routinely say that a shared spiritual life helps keep them close. And as Doug and Beth say, even couples who are on different sides of the theological fence can benefit from praying together daily.

"We have been married for seven years, but praying together is something we didn't start doing until about a year ago," says Doug, a 32-year-old Salt Lake City biochemist. "In the past, whenever we faced big decisions, we'd have discussion after discussion about them, but we'd never really come to a resolution."

"I soon found that praying together brings out a real sense of selflessness and humility," Doug says. "When you're praying for each other, not yourself, you're focused together and speaking from the heart on a whole different level. I would never have predicted this for us, but it really works."

"As bad as any problem may seem at that moment," agrees Beth, "prayer always helps us see beyond it. It doesn't have to be a long-drawn-out scripture reading, just a few minutes a day. When we pray, it brings another level of honesty to our conversations. I think it's the most intimate thing you can do with another person."

Now they pray together every night, once the "urchins" are in bed, which puts them in the company of the 32 percent of American married couples who say they pray together regularly. It also puts them in the company of Julie and Thom, when the other couple isn't holed up in their igloo, of course.

"It's pretty short and not at all scripted," says Julie about their giving thanks before each meal. "We just join hands and let it rip. Whether we're asking for forgiveness or giving thanks, saying it out loud holds a lot of power.

"Besides, regardless of religion or spiritual preference, I think that most marriages require a ton of faith," Julie sums up. "You've got to believe that somehow the two of you are going to make it through things. You've got to believe that you're being blessed with this person. And even if the power we feel just comes from the strength of our love, even if we don't believe that it's God who is helping us, I still think that it's good to acknowledge that there's a force between the two of us that's helping us out."

Courtesy: Yahoo Personals

Posted by Aloha! at 4:19 PM 0 comments

Putting A Priority To Our Relationships

Monday, March 30, 2009

Everyone wants to achieve satisfaction and happiness in their lives. Most of the time, we tend to look for it, in the wrong places. We get ourselves too busy working so hard to make a living, and to buy more things so we could be happy. We thought that the next new car, bigger house, high salary, new clothes could give us real joy. And while, we may achieve some degree of happiness, as what we call as "instant gratification" of our desires, this will not last long.
Nowadays, people are getting busier than ever before, yet contentment is far from our reach.
We don't have time to stop by, have a chitchat with a friend anymore, because we need to hurry to the next appointment and next project.

Yes, we are missing something great by this. Our relationships are most of the time compromised because of our business. We tend to spend less time with our families, with our spouses and children, because we need to tend to something else. We give them their material needs, yet we fail to fill up their emotional tank with our love and concern. We just have no time to stop, and appreciate the great relationships that we have.
Yet, relationships are like flowers. If you take care of it and water it everyday, it will bloom. But if you neglect it, it will wither. As they say, it takes years to find great friendships and relationships, but it only take a second to destroy it.
In these difficult times, the best investment is not found in building assets and money or any material possession. It is found in investing our attention and time in building the best relationships that we can have from our family members, friends, relatives and the members of our Christ's community. And the best investment of all, is our relationship with God.

With this documentary, I am going to be in a journey of love and discovery. A discovery of myself, learning to love myself first, and building relationships that could help fulfill my life.
We're all in this together.

Posted by Aloha! at 4:06 PM 0 comments